'What is going on with me?' perhaps hits the top of my most-asked question lists. A bunch of unexpected things happened just in two weeks time: the fight with my dad, my abrupt decision to get my own place, the interaction between me and him, my new office dynamics, thesis drama, and so many other things. How did those thing affect me as a human being?
I wouldn't say plenty. I have changed over time, and I was fine. I could still adapt and swim with the current. Yet, one of my friends just stroke me with one golden question: what is going on with me. Yes, what is going on with Gadis. She saw how I struggled with my mood swing, and it wasn't okay, at least according to the way she delivered it.
Honestly, I don't even know what is going on. I feel trapped in between the urge to be thankful, to surrender every single dot of my life to God, and to face the toughness in reality. Call me a drug addict, but I have a plateful of medicine over my desk, due to my immunity. Ask me why, I wouldn't be able to answer why I got symptoms of allergy. To what, no answer, either.
I was weak, and lonely. But I finally moved on from thesis migraine, family conflicts, even got a new employment that is sufficient to cover my living cost. So, should I be thankful for the condition? I think so. But, may I express my dislikes for I got infected by anonymous allergic symptoms? I really don't know.
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